Today I return to the Cardiologist for the Nuclear EKG. I will be there over 4 hours because of the setup, prep  which is me drinking a dye that can be seen my the nuclear imaging machine, test and recovery.  Afterward I will have a recoding EKG put on me and I will wear it for 24 hours - which I have to return tomorrow afternoon.

What has been happening since my last visit? 
I am a bit more concerned because I think it is getting worse. I am noticing more palpitations and more pricks of pain. Last week the palpitations where happening on/off for over an hour - a few at a time, then nothing for 10 min or so and then they would happen again. I took a nitro just to be safe and after an hour they were gone.  

I am also noticing that if I don't get at least 8 hrs of sleep, I have palpitations. On those nights were I get over 9, I have very few if none. Last weekend I was busy both days and was up early but did not go to bed until 11pm. On the following monday, I did not feel good all day - very tired (more than normal) and the palpitations  were not more frequent but they seemed stronger.

I have also been tracking my BP (doctors orders) - the systolic is about 125 to 130 average; the diastolic is running on the higher side about 80-85 BUT there were a few days where the diastolic was 90-105, which was worrying.  

Today, the doctor will take the BP monitor we bought and compare its reading to the unit in the office, then they can "adjust" the readings I have been recording in the notebook. This will give them an indication of what the true readings are. 

And of course I don't get the results today, I will have to go back again next week to get the results. I'm hoping that the diagnosis can be handled with beta blockers.

Back in January I applied to Haystack Mountain School of Craft, to attend a metal smithing class for two weeks.  I received the news that I had been accepted in April.  There are several posts about it here on kernology and over at my other website The Adventurous Silversmith 

I returned from my trip last week and I finally have time to write about it.  

Getting to Maine was an adventure in itself. On Saturday, I took a 6:30 am flight out of San Diego to Philly. I would have an hour layover in Philly and then catch a puddle jumper to Bangor, Maine. I would spend the night in Bangor before catching a Taxi to the school on Sunday. I landed in Philly on time but the weather was not cooperating. The connecting flight was delayed, delayed again and then cancelled since the plane was coming from North Carolina and could not take off due to the bad weather. I was put on the next flight at 8pm, which of course was also delayed and then cancelled. You can see where this is going, can't you.  I was bumped to the 9:30 flight and it too was cancelled.  I got myself on the stand by list for the 8:30 am flight with a confirmed seat on the 3:30 pm flight, checked into the Airport Marriott; had a burger in the bar and went to bed around 11:30 pm - totally beat and freaking out I would get to Haystack too late. I hate being late.

Sunday morning I checked in at the airline counter at 6 am and I was the first person on the stand by list though the counter person said the flight was full, I had hope.  Sure enough, there was room on the plane and I was called to board at 8:15. I landed in Bangor just before lunch time and guess what - my bag was not on the plane, it was going to arrive via the 3:30 flight and I would not get it until sometime on Monday, luckily I had a change of clothing in my carry on and my tools had been shipped a head and were waiting for me at Haystack.

I hooked up with the taxi van with another half dozen other students and we were driven for about 2 hours to Haystack. I found myself just looking out the windows at the older homes, the coast when it could be seen, and the trees - the green, green trees.

I miss trees, I miss the sound the trees make when the wind blows through the woods. And the rain, I miss that too.

I arrived at Haystack around 3:00 pm and checked in. I found my cabin and my room mate had not arrived so I opened my boxes and assembled my bed. I had used my bedding as the packing material for my tools which was a good thing other wise I don't know what would have used until my luggage arrived. I wandered around the campus and got warm by the fire until dinner.  Afterwards, we had orientation about how the school is run. Then the metals group had a meet up in the studio and I eventually met Ellen my roomie for the next two weeks.

I won't repeat here, what I did most days in the metals class... But the typical day was: Get up and shower; breakfast at 8 am; work in the metals studio from 9 until noon; lunch; work in the metals studio from 1 until about 4 or 5 pm; call my sweetie for our daily chat; dinner at 6pm; relax and read for about an hour; nightly lecture/presentation at 8 pm; work in the metals studio from 9 pm to 10 or 11 pm; go to sleep.  

Some days I went for a walk in the morning before breakfast or before dinner. I would check email just after lunch or around dinner time. After meals I would grab a cup of tea and read a few pages from a book on my iPad, most nights by the fire. BTW, it was an 800 page novel I started on the plane ride out and I finished in on the plane going home.  Not bad considering everything else that was going on.

Most of the "kids" (all of the other students except one were younger than me by at least 15 years, so I can call them kids) who were in the metals course with me would work in the studio past midnight and some nights they had a bonfire down at the cove with some of the other students as well. I did not hang out with them very much and I tried to eat my meals with different students every time so I met almost everyone in the other courses.  

As I said I would also do some reading at night, which was by the fire in the dining hall.  Someone or groups of people would hang out there most nights and there were varied and very interesting conversations that would result.  Other times I would wander into the other studios just to see what people were working on. 

One night the blacksmith group invited everyone up to their shop because they were inflating metal. That was very cool and fun to watch. Several days later we watched the inflated life preserver get tossed into the ocean so it would get a rust patina on it. 

Over the weekend, we could do what we wanted. I did some work in the shop, I was invited by the ceramics group to join them in a car pool and we went into town to tour some galleries. Saturday night we had a lobster and clam boil down in the cove. 

Another night the class got together with some beer and we showed images of our work.  There was some amazing pieces. 

On the last night there was a dual auction. The live bidding was on the pieces given by the instructors. The silent auction was for those pieces donated by the students.  I won a print of lichen done by a student. I also donated a scarf I wove - it raised over $50! I think, over all they raised several thousand. All the proceeds go to the school for maintenance of the school and their scholarship fund.

There was a visiting writer there as well and there was a writing workshop everyday. I did not go but I did compose my own poem:
A walk in the wood
Silence
A tree fell
I heard it

The flight home was uneventful and my sweetie was waiting for me to bring me home!

To see some of my pictures use this link.

  As of today, I have 28 days to go, until I leave for haystack.

I have to start packing. Not because I want to but because I have too. I  blame my mother it’s that or I am channeling her spirit.

As a child, we as a family did quite a bit of traveling. We would go camping during the summer; take a trip during spring break; I would go away to summer camp for 2 – 6 weeks with the Girl Scouts or even a weekend back packing/camping trip.  After my sister and I had left the nest, my parents still continued to travel the world at least once a year if not more.

Through the years as soon as the word trip or travel was mentioned my mom would pull out a list of standard items that she knew had to be packed. This list had been refined over the years and there were different lists for different types of trips.  The next thing that would happen was that the suit cases were pulled out and dusted off; and then the “MAKING OF THE PILES” would begin and as items were placed on the pile they would be checked of the list. 

I am now making lists in my head. I have pulled the virtual suit cases out and they are arranged in my head and I start to plan what I need to take with me: Tools, Materials, Bedding, Clothing and the other bits and bobs.

I said to my husband the other night "I need to start packing for Haystack".   I just heard a groan from the other room. Yes, I am channeling my mothers spirit.

What motivates you?
As I have written about earlier, I'm struggling with my weight and I am not really motivated to loose it.

When we are younger we are brainwashed into believing that skinny is better and it will attract a partner/spouse; that's why we should keep our weight down and our looks up.

When I was in high school and in college I was very athletic (strange for a geek, I know) but back then girls did not do weight training. In college I Fenced and did quite a bit of training: stretching, weights, swimming, fencing, running and even playing chess. Each item brought different skills to the game and I was quite good at it. BUT the effect of all this training was I put on quite a bit of muscle. I think I went to college weighing about 110 pounds and I was quite skinny. When I graduated, I weighed about 135 and at one point my father said I was FAT. 

Now that I am older and I have a husband (and not looking to find another one!) I certainly don't listen to those who tell me that IF: I put on a little makeup I would look "more appealing" - Hey my husband likes the way I look. By loosing weight, think of all the great fashion I could wear - No thank you! I am quite happy to wear baggy jeans and t-shirts. Then there are the general health reasons - well I may not be in World Class shape but I am not going to die of a heart attack any time soon (if this post is not finished, maybe I dropped dead here and now).

As you can see, telling me all these "common" reasons doesn't do it for me. I need a goal - some thing to accomplish and everything else is just a consequence. 

Here let me give you an example.  Years ago I was told that I "needed" to learn Java (the programming language) as it would help my career. I started to learn it and got rather bored and set it aside and actually, it has not influenced my career one bit.  Now I have an Android phone. I want to program a few apps for myself and oh, guess what -  I have to now learn Java. Learning Java for just knowing it does nothing for me. 

Basically it come down to this - I need a goal for learning. To learn, I need something to apply it to. 

So were it this all going? Over the past few months I have done some more weight training and just going to the gym to lift weights is not so fun for me. I was taking walks at lunch but I gave up because the results were too slow to appear.  But through all of this I found I was dreaming about RUNNING. Nothing was chasing me, I not running way from anything. I was just running, out along a trail  and I WAS HAPPY, I WAS HAVING FUN.  Hmm, maybe my dreams were telling me something?

So yesterday I got new running shoes; track pants and jog bra.  I have also set a goal of running a 5K in by summer, and no it won't be fast AND I am going to aim for a 10K in either November or December. 

Today I went for my first walk. Here are my stats: 2.14 miles in 29:51 minutes. My average speed was 4.31 mph. 

FYI I am using the free app Google MyTracks which you can use to record distance for all sorts of activities.  I will be posting my progress as I go